So there I was, on amazon.com…
Trying to buy one of these bad boys
And I’m wondering if this particular product is any good, so I look at the reviews. This was the most helpful good review…
And this was the most helpful bad review…
I fudging love this fandom.
no one has a crush on me. i am too strong to be crushed
I say, ‘I am fat.’
He says ‘No, you are beautiful.’
I wonder why I cannot be both.
He kisses me
My college theater professor once told me
that despite my talent,
I would never be cast as a romantic lead.
We do plays that involve singing animals
and children with the ability to fly,
but apparently no one
has enough willing suspension of disbelief
to go with anyone loving a fat girl.
I daydream regularly
about fucking my boyfriend vigorously on his front lawn.
On the mornings I do not feel pretty,
while he is still asleep,
I sit on the floor and check the pockets of his skinny jeans for motive,
for a punchline,
for other girls’ phone numbers.
When we hold hands in public,
I wonder if he notices the looks —
like he is handling a parade balloon on a crowded sidewalk;
if he notices that my hands are now made of rope.
Dear Cosmo: Fuck you.
I will not take sex tips from you
on how to please a man you think I do not deserve.
He tells me he loves me with the lights on.
I can cup his hip bone in my hand,
feel his ribs without pressing very hard at all.
He does not believe me when I tell him he is beautiful.
Sometimes I fear the day he does will be the day he leaves.
The cute hipster girl at the coffee shop
assumes we are just friends
and flirts over the counter.
I spend the next two weeks
mentally replacing myself with her
in all of our photographs.
When I admit this to him
we spend the evening taking new photos together.
He will not let me delete a single one of them.
The phrase “Big girls need love too” can die in a fire.
Fucking me does not require an asterisk.
Loving me is not a fetish.
Finding me beautiful is not a novelty.
I am not a fucking novelty.
I say, ‘I am fat.’
He says, ‘No. You are so much more’,
and kisses me
Ten Honest Thoughts On Being Loved By A Skinny Boy, Rachel Wiley
(I have read this before, but for some reason this is the first time it has made me suddenly burst into tears. It was #8 that killed me.)
Three years later, a new girl sits cross-legged on your bed.
She tastes like a different flavor of bubblegum than you are used to.
She opens up a book that you had to read in high school, and a folded picture of us falls out of chapter three.
Now there are two unfinished stories resting in her lap.
Inevitably, she asks, and you tell her.
You say: I dated her a while back.
You don’t say: Sometimes, when I’m holding you, I imagine the smell of her vanilla perfume.
You say: She was younger than me.
You don’t say: The sixteen summers in her bones warmed the eighteen winters my skin had weathered.
You say: It’s nothing now."
You don’t say: But it was everything then.
— Some things are better left unsaid. (via stolenwine)
- DC: We can't do a Wonder Woman movie, no one would watch it.
- Marvel: YOU WILL CRY OVER THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN A TREE AND A RACCOON AND YOU WILL LIKE IT
im really pissed that palindrome isnt palindrome backwards
Ah, yes but emordnilap is a word!
An emornilap is any word that, when spelled backwards, produces another word. Examples of emordnilap pairs include:
- desserts & stressed
- drawer & reward
- gateman & nametag
- time & emit
- laced & decal
- regal & lager
And therefore “emordnilap palindrome” is an emordnilap palindrome.
Which I, for one, think is really frickin’ cool.